CD12 get to trigger tonight!!!!!!!!!!!

yay!!! only one jab to get the blood drawn today! Thank you Bianca! You know what you are doing to draw blood!!

Had my ultrasound, was a little bummed he didn't give me the measurements but they must have been (or at least one) over 18 cuz he smiled huge and said today is the day!!!!!!!!!!

I only have to give myself my trigger shot tonight and I am done with jabbing myself for a while! That makes me so happy!

I think all the grow follie grow juju from the TTGP girls helped!

IUI is scheduled for Friday morning. E has to be there at 8:10 and I am up for 9:40. I really really hope this is it finally!!!

But for now I am off to go kayaking at moms even though it is kinda cool and cloudy out it should be a nice morning for a paddle.

CD11 More pokes and jabs

Today was my CD11 ultrasound. She wanted me to come back today instead of tomorrow because of how much my 2 follicles grew over the weekend.
So first stop was for them to attempt to draw my blood again. Both my arms are super bruised up from the last 2 days of digging around for veins. I wish they would just send me to the regular lab where the ladies do it all day every day. But they want to be able to process it in their own lab. I have never had a problem with anyone getting blood until this past Friday.
Sooooo she digs and digs on my right arm since my left is really bruised from the day before. She gets nothing. So she got a smaller needle and went fishing on the left arm and finally got a vein.

Back to the room I go. Wait on the table and the Dr who normally does my ultrasounds comes in with one of the other doctors. And they check my lining which was 9mm I think and then go to check my follies. They measured the ones on the right 4 times! On the left there were a couple small ones and on the right are the two dominant ones. The two of them chatted and chatted and checked the measurements like 3 times and the male dr (wish I remembered his name) turns around and goes "you missed by 1mm" So they were both 17mm they want them over 18mm for me to trigger.

I am slightly bummed cuz that means more blood tomorrow and another ultrasound and man are those pricey when your insurance stops covering this crap. But timing wise for the IUI it works out great because the IUI would be Friday this way instead of me having to cancel my 5k on the 4th of July.

First post! :)

My first attempt at blogging....
Here goes nothing!
Hopefully this will save my had from writing everything! Cuz man am I behind at journaling in the journal I bought for this purpose! 
I am going to go back in time and put everything here from my journal. Or maybe just this cycle... Don't know, depends on how much I feel like typing!

CD10

CD 10 ultrasound day. More digging around for veins. The nurse tried twice before giving up and telling me she would try again after the ultrasound. The sad thing is that I didn't even bleed after she stopped digging around so she must not have been close to anything. The nurse who couldn't get it on Friday was standing there and said she felt better that she wasn't the only one that had a problem with me.

So after 9 days of 75IU Gonal-F I had a few small follies on the left and a couple small ones and 2 larger on the right. The ones on the right were 16.5mm and 15.5mm. She looked at the measurements from Friday and went "wow those grew fast" so she wants me to do another 75IU of Gonal-F and come back Tuesday instead of Wednesday so we "don't miss it".

So I pull my clothes back on go into the hallway and smile at the nurse and say "you ready to stab me again?" at which point another nurse Bianca said she would try. She sat me down, cranked the tourniquet on my arm and grabbed the needle and first try got it. Thank god!

By the time I got home I had bled through the cotton ball and almost the bandaid, so she really got me good. It had stopped but now I have a decent bruise.

CD7 first follie check!!!!

I was so excited this morning to go see what all the stabbing myself in the stomach had brought about!

Got there and they called me back and I sit down to have my blood drawn for my E2 check. And she barely put the darn tourniquet around my arm made me squeeze a wash cloth and went fishing. Damn it hurt! Once in my left and then once in my right. So she said I was dehydrated and took me back to the room for the ultrasound.

So I saw a different doctor than I normally see for my ultrasounds he went in and found I had 2 on my right that were larger and a few on my left. So the ones on the right were like 8 and 9mm I think maybe a little bigger. So he told me to do 3 more shots of the 75IU of Gonal-F and to come back on Monday. But that meant I needed to order more from Freedom so there goes another $444... ugh... and I wouldn't even use the full dose up most likely.... feels like a waste of money but if it gets us a baby then it is so worth it!

He leaves and the nurse brings me water and has me sit in the waiting room chugging water for like 10 minutes. Then calls me back and gos mega digging in my arm again. She still got nothing and finally decided to send me to the building next door to the lab. The lab where apparently all the preggos go for bloodwork. So I sit on the bench with 2 preggos and then another runs in who is almost late for her blood draw for her glucose check. So I was nice and let her go first.

The lab lady looked at my arms and shook her head and got a vein first try and apologized for the ladies at my drs office.

Clomid again... IUI#4 & 6 month post surgery SA

Thursday May 9, 2013
IUI#4
Our break cycle was a bust so 2nd cycle with clomid only hot flashes this time so better than Femara!
I had my monitoring yesterday and had a 23mm on the right and a 22mm and a 16mm on the left, so I got my trigger shot and right now I am waiting for the IUI!
I am about over all of this! The Dr who did the US said I might want to schedule an appt with Dr S to discuss what we are going to do next. I couldn't bring myself to schedule it yesterday.
But maybe I will schedule it after the 2ww is over that way I can cancel if by some miracle this works.
Right now I don't know if I want to do IVF and fairly certain that I do not want to adopt. I guess it is getting to be that time where we need to sit down and talk this out and figure out how far we are going to go with all this.

My faith in all of this is waivering
2 years is such a long time and maybe it is just not going to happen for us
I am okay with maybe 2 more IUIs if needed but dotn' know how much more I can take.
The meds mess with me so much.

Post wash numbers 31 mil 80% motile

June 6, 2013
6 month post surgery SA followup showed some improvement
144 mil, morph holding steady at 7% and same with motility 40%
Dr O released E.

Next steps appointment :(

IUI 4 was a bust so I scheduled an appt to see Dr S to see what she thinks we should do next.
Of course I was on CD5 when I went in so nothing was going to be able to happen and we would have to take a cycle off but I am kind of okay with that!

She was happy with the follies I was producing with both Clomid and Femara and also said that our counts had been consistently good from E so she was kind of bummed that it hadn't happened yet. She was also concerned because of our age we really shouldn't be waiting around for it to happen.

Our options per her were to move on to IVF, and she talked me through the whole process, which as of yet I am unsure I am ready to move onto. Or we could try to do another IUI cycle or two with injectibles. Since they can control the hormones a little better and get a better quality egg/eggs out of the cycle. The chance of multiples is a little higher but not by much.

She asked which I thought I would like to do and I told her I was leaning toward trying another IUI because I wasn't ready to commit to IVF at that point. She seemed okay with that but seemed like she didn't want us to wait too much longer before moving on.

So the nurse comes in and walks me through everything I need to do before my next cycle starts, which included calling the insurance to make sure I was covered and that the meds would be covered. So I put it off a day or two and finally called the insurance company. I started giving the girl the procedure codes and she was quiet for a minute and then asked if it all the appointments were related to infertility treatment and I told her yes. She was quiet again for a minute and then said "I am so sorry to have to tell you that you have already met your lifetime max of $5,000 for infertility treatments" I didn't know how to respond. She apologized again and then told me that means the meds wouldn't be covered either. She kept saying sorry. I had a feeling since our previous couple IUIs had been covered and I didn't know how much coverage we had.

So I started to call pharmacies and they all said they didn't want to tell me how much the meds would be, dang they are expensive! But Freedom Pharmacy had the cheapest prices by far. So I called back to the RE office and asked them if they could call me in a lower dose to save money since I would be out of pocket and she told me that wouldn't be a problem she would call in the 450IU instead of 900IU so $444 instead of $888.

So that night I had to tell E that this cycle wouldn't be covered. So he asked how much it would cost. My estimate based on the printouts I had gotten was showing including meds it would be anywhere from $4000 to $8000 depending on how many U/Ss and blooddraws. I think he was going to crap his pants. I told him that it would be cheaper than IVF and we would try it once and see. He told me he just wished there was a guarantee that if we spent that much money we would get a baby. I agree but what are we going to do